Showing posts with label Chaz. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Chaz. Show all posts

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

DECEMBER, 2009 – JANUARY 9, 2013


       The last couple of years have been a bit difficult for me.
  1. DECEMBER, 2009 – Caleb has tumor removed from his intestine
  2. JANUARY 1, 2010      – went into hospital due to a cat bite on my foot
  3. FEBRUARY 25, 2010 – Clark euthanized (11 years old)
  4. MARCH 19, 2010 – Charlotte euthanized (9 years old)
  5. JULY 30, 2010 – Cammie euthanized (15 years old)
  6. AUGUST – SEPTEMBER, 2010 – me back in hospital for 5 surgeries, including a skin graft
  7. DECEMBER 10, 2010 – Chase found dead (7 years old)
  8. FEBRUARY 12, 2011 – Chaz euthanized (12 years old)
  9. MARCH 11, 2011 – Colin euthanized (rescued from the street 1998 – adult cat)
  10. APRIL 22, 2011  - Caleb euthanized (15 years old DOG)
  11. MAY 21, 2011 – Cagney rescued from the street
  12. JUNE 14, 2011 – Charlie euthanized (12 years old)
  13. JUNE 24, 2011 – Cissy euthanized (16 years old)
  14. NOVEMBER 11, 2011 – Claudia euthanized (rescued from Animal Services 2005 – older cat)
  15. NOVEMBER 28, 2011 – Campbell has all teeth removed
  16. DECEMBER 12, 2011 – Colt euthanized (8 years old)
  17. JANUARY 12, 2012 – Courtney euthanized (13 years old)
  18. FEBRUARY 16, 2012 – Cordelia euthanized (14 years old DOG)
  19. FEBRUARY, 2012 – Cashew (kitten) + Contessa (about 1 year old) rescued from street
  20. JUNE 29, 2012 - Chandler euthanized (13 years old)
  21. AUGUST 2, 2012 – Crockett had all his teeth removed
  22. JANUARY 9, 2013 – Cassandra having surgery to remove all of her teeth
Prior to having to put so many of these cats and dogs to sleep, there were extensive veterinary bills for treatment in an effort to save or, at least, prolong their lives.  It's not just about "pocketbook" issues but also the emotional distress that goes along with dealing with watching so many cherished loved ones die.  

While I know that most, if not all, of these animals would have died long before had I not brought them into my home, my life and my heart, it stills takes a toll.  My own health struggles helped erode my coping skills as well.  These were choices which I made and, therefore, are mine alone to bear.  

My apologies to friends if I've been more short tempered or less communicative in the past couple of years.  It's not always easy to exude sunshine and roses through personal trials and tribulations.  

Friday, June 29, 2012

Another One Bites the Dust


In 1999, when I was relatively new to the feral cat “community” and Trap/Neuter/Return I answered a call from a very nice woman who needed help trapping a litter of 8 – 10 week old feral kittens.  She had managed to trap the mother cat and her semi-grown kittens from a previous litter and get them all fixed through Orange County’s CARE program.  In 1999 I had recently become the president of CARE and we did not normally go out and do the trapping.  She was a very sweet woman and desperately worried that the homeowner’s association would call either animal control or critter control and the kittens along with the ones she had already fixed (and bonded with) would be trapped and killed.  I talked at a meeting of the homeowner’s association and convinced them to hold off on trapping, explaining that CARE worked in partnership with Orange County Animal Services to trap, alter and vaccinate cats.  My intention was to trap the kittens and return them “to the wild.”  

I only managed to catch one kitten on my first attempt.  She was absolutely beautiful, but completely wild.  Being a novice I felt she was too old to try to tame/socialize her.  So, once she was spayed and recovered, I returned her.  She died within 2 days, which devastated me.  I decided once I trapped the rest (actually 4 remaining littermates and 2 from the litter of another female), I would make every effort to socialize them and find homes for them, although CARE did not do adoptions.  I felt I had enough contacts in the rescue community that I could easily find a group who would handle the adoptions.  I was ridiculously lucky, trapping all 6 kittens at once, something I never managed to do again in the following 8 years of trapping expeditions.  

After dropping the little ones off at the clinic in the morning, I saw a kitten blithely walking across a normally very busy road as I was driving home.  Of course, I stopped and picked him up and took him home.  He was about the same age as the kittens, but he was the friendliest kitten I had ever seen.  He cuddled on my chest and purred all the way home.  

Within two days of bringing the 6 kittens home, I noticed one of them (Chaz) had a beard of bubbles on his chin.  I called my veterinarian and she told me to come in the next morning with all of the kittens because, at least, Chaz had calicivirus, which was/is highly contagious.  No doubt they had contracted it at the animal services clinic and that is probably what caused their sister’s death.  Charlise, Chaz’ sister was the only one in the 2 litters who got sick, seriously sick.  However, Clark, the sweet boy I picked up off the street, got deathly ill as well, along with one of my adult cats, Catherine.  All were bundled off to the veterinary clinic, where both Charlise and Catherine spent 2 weeks for treatment and force-feeding.  Clark was the sickest and spent a month at the vet’s office before he began eating on his own.  Whew – we had dodged a bullet.  It is always dreadful to lose one of my animals, but losing kittens is the worst by far for me.  As of tonight, Charlise is the last of this little family of kittens/cats.

CISCO

I lost Cisco suddenly on February 16, 2008.  I had taken him to my vet because the nictitating membranes (third eyelid) in both of his eyes were partially up.  He had no other signs of illness.  He hadn’t lost weight, he was eating, so I didn’t suspect there was anything seriously wrong.  Within 2 or 3 days, he had died.  The vet suspected either liver or pancreatic cancer.  

Darling Clark, the kitten rescued from the 6 lane highway died, after a long wasting, undiagnosed illness, on February 25, 2010.  He had grown into a Velcro cat.  He would leap through the air, almost like a bird, to be in my arms.  He would leap from the floor, from a countertop, the bed or the arm of a chair, flying into my arms without scratching me or digging in with his claws.  Turning my back did not do any good in dissuading him from his goal, so there were many times he would end up on my back, much like a living backpack.  

CHAZ

Chaz first developed plasma cell stomatitis, a common result of having had calicivirus in early 2008.   I had most of his teeth removed in April, 2008.  He was fine for awhile.  By the end of 2010 it was obvious he had a problem with one of his ears.  Cordelia, one of my dogs, would continuously clean Chaz’ ear, while Chaz would lie there seeming to enjoy the cleaning, grooming process.  I took Chaz to my vet and she found that he had a cancerous, inoperable tumor in his ear.  His health deteriorated and I had to have him euthanized on February 12, 2011.  

CHARLIE

As Chaz was going through his illness, his brother Charlie, another sweet, extremely affectionate boy began losing weight much like Clark   He would lose weight, and then seem to recover and start putting some of the weight back on he had lost for a period, and then start losing weight again.  I took him to the vet on numerous occasions, had tests run again and again to no avail  X-rays, blood tests, nothing revealed what was causing the weight loss.  I had to force feed him from time to time, as well as give him sub-cutaneous fluids to keep him hydrated.  Finally, it became obvious that he wasn’t going to recover and his weight loss was decimating him.   I had often brought him to work with me, and everyone on staff fell in love with him.  He was happiest in someone’s arms.  I let him go and had him put down on June 14th, 2011.  

At that point, I had only 3 cats of the original 6 remaining.  Of those one had never become tame, Chandler.  Over the years, I had only managed to get a quick “pet” of him while he was eating.  Generally, If I got within about 3 feet of him, he would hiss and take off.  Courtney, one of Chaz’ and Charlie’s sisters who was among the three, had remained feral for the first year after joining my herd of cats.  Then, surprisingly, she lay on the edge of the bed, rolled onto her back and looked up at me, asking for a belly rub.  At the top of my can’t resist list is a kitty tummy.  Regardless of the potential danger, the soft fur of a kitty tummy is totally irresistible to me. From that moment on, I could pet her and love on her and she never failed to offer me her tummy for a rub.  

COURTNEY

Courtney developed a snuffing noise during the time I was dealing with other seriously ill cats.  I assumed it was an upper respiratory problem, so I used a vaporizer to try to clear it up.  I tried a nebulizer, but neither did any good.  I took her to the vet, who insisted it was, in fact, an upper respiratory illness despite my insistence that wasn’t the problem.  In late 2011 she spent a week at the vet’s office, but she continued snuffling when I took her home.  I did some research on the internet, the vet did x-rays because I was certain she had a nasal tumor.  I ended up taking her to the area veterinary specialists, where they did a CAT scan.  Unfortunately, I was right.  She has nasopharyngeal carcinoma.   It was an inoperable, fatal condition.  She was fine for a while, but one morning she started having seizures.  I rushed her to the vet and had her euthanized.  That was on January 12, 2012.  

About a month or two after losing Courtney, Chandler began losing weight, much like Clark and Charlie had done.  After visiting two different vets, both of whom failed to diagnose either Clark’s or Charlie’s conditions, I saw no need to go through the frustration and enormous costs just to be told either “don’t know” or “can’t treat”. Chandler continued to eat, quite a bit, being the first cat with his head in a bowl of food.  As he continued to lose weight, I called my vet’s office to alert them that I would be dropping him off, explaining he was feral and would have to be sedated to be examined.  The problem?  I couldn’t catch him.  After making several attempts, I gave up.  Then one day, to my great surprise, he allowed me to pet him.  Within a week or two, he allowed me to pick him up, and even carry him around.  I took him into the vet and she postulated, due to feeling a mass in his abdominal region that he either had a kidney tumor or one in his spleen.  By this time he had lost a considerable amount of weight and certainly could not withstand a major surgery.  

CHANDLER

I refuse to sanction surgeries to remove tumors, especially internal ones.  Every time I’ve had that done to other dogs or cats, the cancer spread like wild fire throughout their bodies.  I had put Cricket through 5 surgeries for mammary cancer, many years before.  After the 5th surgery, the tumors returned within 2 days.  The vet suggested subcutaneous fluids daily for Chandler after giving him an antibiotic injection. He lasted 2 weeks.  Although he ate a small amount yesterday morning before I left for work, and the fact that I knew his remaining time was very limited, I chose not to take him to the vet on Thursday to have him euthanized.  I wasn’t ready to give up and he didn’t seem to be ready either.  However, when I got home from work, it was obvious that it was time. He’d spent the day in a carrier.  When I first looked at him, lying with his head in a awkward, unnatural position, I feared he had died while I was at work.  He was alive but terribly weak, so I arranged to bring him to the vet in the morning.  It became obvious within the hour that he probably wouldn’t last the night.  He was uncomfortable and probably in pain. I took him to the nearest emergency clinic and had him euthanized.  At least, after 13 years of longing to touch him, pet him and hold him, I had the opportunity to do that for the final weeks of his life.  It was a special gift he gave me in the end that I will always treasure.  To hear him purr for me when I petted him and hold him was a reward that I shall always cherish.  

Little, petite Charlise, stunted by her early illness, remains the last of the group of kittens saved from a shorter, more difficult life on their own.  May she live many, many more years.  


CHARLISE



Sunday, December 25, 2011

Another Death in the Family


The last 2 years have taken a toll on me and my furry family.  I began 2010 in the hospital due to a cat bite on my foot.  The day after Christmas 2009 I stepped on Claudia in the dark.  She retaliated – naturally – by biting me.  Due to my diabetes, my doctor was concerned that it could develop into something serious, so on New Year’s Day as the redness spread, I checked myself into the hospital.  After lots of antibiotics, I went home in about a week. 

On February 25th, the day after my 60th birthday, I put Clark to sleep.  Less than a month later, on March 19th, I put Charlotte to sleep.  A few months later, on July 30th, I put Cammie to sleep.  I was concerned about Charlie as the year was winding down.  He was eating plenty but was losing weight.  The vet couldn’t find anything in his blood work to determine what ailed him.  Then on December 10th, when I went into the cat room to clean litter boxes and feed, I found Chase’s body. 

In between Cammie’s and Chase’s deaths, I spent 23 days in the hospital for what began as an infected cyst in my right breast.  I developed necrotizing fasciitis (flesh eating bacteria) and had 4 surgeries to stop the infection from spreading.  I ended up losing half my right breast and all but a small area of the skin.  Once released, I returned to the hospital daily for treatments in the hyperbaric oxygen chamber.  That lasted into early 2011.  I had a skin graft, which removed a large area of skin from my right thigh.  Most of the graft took, leaving a small area with exposed tissue.  I had 13 derma grafts to encourage skin growth.  The area finally closed up and I was released by the doctor in May or June – memory fails me now.  My health had taken a back seat to my efforts to keep many cats alive.

Chaz was the first to go on February 12th, 2011.  About a month later, Colin unexpectedly took a turn for the worse and was euthanized on March 18th.  About 2 weeks later, Caleb, one of my three dogs, had a stroke and he was euthanized on April 2nd. 

Charlie & I struggled so hard to find out what was wrong with him and to get him better.  That fight ended on June 14th.  Less than 2 weeks later, Cissy succumbed to kidney failure and was euthanized on June 24th.  In the midst of the treating Charlie and Cissy, Claudia was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism and went blind.  She was doing well on her meds, but developed stones in her bladder and blood in her urine.  Treatment failed to help her and she was in no shape for surgery.  She was put to sleep on November 14th.  Colt went to the vet in September due to a sore area in his mouth.  It was an eosiniphilic granuloma, and a shot of depoprovera cleared it up.  I was concerned about the fact that I could hear him breathing.  It wasn’t loud, but I knew it wasn’t normal.  The vet examined him and couldn’t hear anything.  He was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism as well.  He took his pills well, but by late November he had stopped eating canned food.  I tried baked chicken and baby food, but I couldn’t get him to eat it.  I couldn’t find him Sunday night or Monday morning to give him his pills.  I was determined to find him Monday night, and I did.  I found him because I heard his loud breathing sounds.  I took him to the Veterinary Emergency Clinic, where he was x-rayed.  The x-rays showed problem areas in one of his lungs.  The following morning I took him to my regular vet and from there to Affiliated Veterinary Specialists.  I left him there and they had to take more x-rays.  Dr. Goodman was as concerned about his heart as his lungs.  However, when I returned she told me that both she and the radiologist concurred – Colt had lung cancer.  There weren’t tumors but bleeding within the lungs.  There was nothing that could be done for him, except to prolong his suffering by keeping him in an oxygen cage.  I chose to do what was best for him, although I wasn’t ready to let him go.  I took him back to The Cat Hospital and Dr. Gray put him to sleep.  That was on Tuesday, December 20th.  Colt was only 8 years old.  Chase, who I lost just before Christmas in 2010, was his sister.  Their mom, Bob, and their sister Chaka and brother Crockett are still with me. 

In between dealing with the illnesses and deaths of Claudia and Colt, Campbell had to have all his teeth removed and Courtney (Chaz & Charlie’s sister) spent 10 days at The Cat Hospital for an eye infection and respiratory problem.  Her respiratory problems have yet to be solved, but a tumor in her nasal passage has been ruled out.  Cordelia, my 13 year old pit bull mix, was diagnosed with lymphoma at the end of November.  She has responded to the prednisone, but the vet has given her 6 months at best. 

This year has been a very expensive one:  my vet bills have amounted to around $10,000.  I not only need to win the lottery but to get a magic wand to insure good health for the rest of my cats and dogs.  Cowboy, Crystal and Cho-sun are 5 years old and Cagney is just under a year old.  Everyone else is 8 years old or older.  So, 2012 is just around the corner.  I can only hope that it will be a much, much better and healthier year for all of us.  

Grief is, in my opinion, the most personal of human emotions.  It really isn't something that can be shared with others because the weight of the loss is ours, alone, to carry and learn to cope with.  And, it's complicated.  Memories of all the losses rear their ugly heads and add to the sadness.  No doubt reading this will stir memories in each of you for all those whom you have lost.  Death is a part of life and is something each of us will have to learn to deal with in our own ways.  While I truly hate making the decision to end the life of my dear cats and dogs, I am grateful that I have the option to end their suffering and not have to watch, helplessly, as they endure a prolonged and fatal illness.  Ultimately, it makes me grieve more for the millions of wonderful and healthy animals who are killed daily in so-called shelters around the world.  I continue to hold out hope that the needless killing will stop one day soon and only those who are suffering and have no chance to recover are those who are given respite through euthanasia. 


Friday, September 16, 2011

A year later

I've been home from the major hospital stay for nearly a year.  The follow-up, post hospital, has been a very bumpy ride.  Chase, Chaz, Colin, Charlie, Cissy & Caleb - gone, but not forgotten.  My half sized right breast finally completely healed, after a very painful skin graft & 13 derma grafts.  Of course, the aftermath is a scarred, nasty looking thing - but I'm the only one that has to look at it, so it really doesn't matter. 

The worst part is that the extended change of routine has left me unable & unwilling to get back on the treadmill of life.  I'm still in first gear, with little to no motivation to even attempt second gear.  I'm feeling my age.  I've come face to face with my own mortality.  Things just look different from this new perspective.  And, I'm flatout tired all of the time.  Fewer things carry much importance.  It's a struggle to get going in the morning.  I don't look forward to a heck of a lot.  I've restricted my life even more and prefer to stay home than go anywhere or do anything.  I'm not sad, just tired and not motivated.  Que sera, sera.  I guess Doris Day was right. 

Claudia's hyperthyroidism seems to be under control.  That's good, but she has blood in her urine and antibiotics haven't helped.  Colt has been losing weight, so he went to the vet this week.  He has hyperthyroidism as well, just not as bad as Claudia's was to begin with.  He also has an eosinophilic granuloma on the inside of his upper left lip.  Steroid shot & thyroid medicine for him. 

Oh, and I tore up my dishwasher months ago.  My washer & dryer work when they feel like it & I need 4 new tires for the CRV.  And, it would be a big help if I could just win the lottery.  If anyone reading this is psychic, please send me the winning lottery numbers.  I'm more than willing to share the jackpot with you. 

With any luck, I'll get back on track and work through this living in slow motion condition.  I wonder if this is what PTSD feels like.  After all, for nearly 2 years I've dealt with an unbelievable amount of personal tragedy.  In addition to 2 hospitalizations in a single year, the loss of 8 cats and 1 dog since February, 2010 has been devastating.  The brightest spot in all of this:  Cagney (the Hell on Wheels kitten).  Rarely does a day go by that she doesn't make me smile and/or laugh.  This kitten, who surely would have died had I not managed to get her trapped when I did, has a personality the size of the state of Alaska.  She's fearless, funny, acrobatic and delightful.  Life is new to her and she reminds me that life can be interesting and fun.  For the time being I'll remain an observer, witnessing it through her eyes. 

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Charlie, Cissy & Cagney……and HAIR


I finally decided it was time to let Charlie go.  I took him to my vet on Monday, June 13th and put him down.  He and I had struggled off and on since May, 2010 with his drastic weight loss.  All of the recriminations were and are there.  It’s tough, but rarely have I lost one of my critters and not questioned myself and what I could have done better.  Losing them brings me face to face with the fact that I do not have all of the answers, I do not have super powers and DEATH is a fact of life.  Death is too powerful an adversary for any of us.  We may win some victories, but we can’t win in the end.  Even though it is inevitable that Death always has the final victory, I will continue to fight for as much time as I can salvage.  I did that with Cissy.  I took her to the vet on Tuesday, June 14th and again on Thursday, June 16th, prepared to put her down.  My guilty conscience over not giving her as much attention as I should have while treating Charlie overruled all else.  I tried treating her chronic renal failure and for a few days, she responded, but by Friday,  June 24th it was obvious she was not going to make it.  I had her put down Friday morning. 

In between this, on Wednesday morning, June 22nd, Cagney the new kitten, wasn’t able to walk on her left front leg.  She was lethargic and not eating.  She was very hot to the touch, so I knew she had a fever.  I took her to the vet early Wednesday morning and her temp was nearly 105 degrees.  Normal for a cat is between 101 & 102.  Although she had her first vaccine about 2 ½ weeks earlier, I felt certain she had limping kitten syndrome from calicivirus.  Calici is hard to eradicate in a multi-cat household.  It first appeared here in 1999 after bringing kittens home from surgery at animal services.  One kitten, Chaz, presented with symptoms.  He didn’t get sick with it, but Clark, Charlise and Catherine got deathly ill from it.  My vet pulled them through, but the ramifications from this disease caused a plague of plasma cell stomatitis to hit my cats, who included Chase, Carly, Bob, Charlie, Chaz, Colt and Courtney.  All of them had most or all of their teeth removed.  Of those cats only Bob, Colt and Courtney are still with me.  I have also lost Clark and Catherine in the past few years.  Needless to say, I was seriously concerned about little Cagney. 

Limping kitten syndrome was seen several years ago and was attributed to vaccinations.  Most kittens showed symptoms within 48 – 72 hours following their vaccination.  They limped, had inflamed joints and fevers.  In many cases, the symptoms went away within a few days.  Since Cagney’s vaccination was over 2 weeks earlier, my fear was she had contracted calici from a carrier in the house and her recovery wouldn’t take the normal route.  With some fluids, to reduce her fever, and force feeding she started showing improvement within a few days and by yesterday she was more active and walking and eating normally.   I can only hope this incident won’t have long term ramifications for Cagney.  It’s to be expected to lose older cats, but it’s devastating for me to lose a kitten.  So much potential never realized. 

The one bright spot this past week was seeing the road company of HAIR at the Bob Carr.  OMGoddess!  This show has been such a big part of my life since college.  I played and played and played the soundtrack to the Broadway play in my dorm room.  I saw the road show at the Coconut Grove Playhouse in 1970.  Yes, I tend to be “a bit” obsessive and HAIR has been an ongoing obsession.  And, if you aren’t familiar with it or haven’t seen it, please DO NOT see the movie.  It’s a complete bastardization of the original play.  If the road show is coming to a town near you, run – do not walk – and buy a ticket.  You won’t regret it.  Most of the road show company has been a part of this play since its revival on Broadway a few years ago and the London company following its run on Broadway.  Although the play dates back to 1967 and is about the Viet Nam war, it is still relevant today.  Some things stay the same:  calls for peace, freedom & clean air. 
PEACE